A Record of Life and Thoughts

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Man Behind the Curtain

So I've been struggling with my thoughts lately.  Yep, sometimes Satan's whispering rattles me a little bit.  He likes to plant those seeds of doubt and then I let myself water them.  So maybe writing it out will make me feel better.  There are times where I feel like the man behind the curtain.  I'm working hard, doing everything behind the scenes to make my little part of camp work, doing tasks that others may not even notice when they are done but will notice if they aren't.  I'm okay with this.  I don't look for the limelight.  But Satan likes to plant seeds of, "No one appreciates you," "They take you for granted and use you," and "You're just the grinning lachey, doing their bidding without a complaint."  And then I water those and let those thoughts grow until I believe them.  You start to notice little things and possible slights and that only helps those thoughts grow.  I need to put some weed killer on those thoughts.  Still working on that.  Hoping that I can push those thoughts aside and replace them with true thoughts.  I don't mind working hard and not being in the limelight, I'd just like to know, every once in a while, that it's appreciated.  And to have those words come from those around me would be a nail in the coffin of those thoughts.  Then I remind myself that I don't do what I do for the praise of men, no matter how much I want that, but to glorify God.  If I did what I could to the best of my abilities and glorified Him through it, that should be all that matters....I just have to keep telling my thoughts that.

2 comments:

  1. Camp is sooooooooo lucky to have you, and I think we've all been there, and sometimes it definitely helps to just write it down. But so glad you are able to use this to reflect. And always remember that you are so appreciated. I remember leading the Horse Pack trip last summer, and those kids think you are the bomb dot com. Pretty soon kids are going to be flocking to the stables and so excited to see you, and that's when you'll know that it matters and why you are there. In these prep times, things often go unnoticed, but I know you're out there workin hard, and you do so many great things for Camp T. Keep up the good work. Kids will be there soon!!!!

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  2. Thanks Krafty! That means a lot. It's been a lot of work but I know it's worth it. We'll miss you this summer!

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