Disagreeing does not equal hate

Wow!  All I've seen on FB recently is a firestorm of hate and intolerance regarding the defense of marriage act.  I do not wish to start an argument on FB because that's just a way for folks to get their feathers all ruffled and nothing good ever comes of it.  So, if you are interested enough to click on this link and read my blog, then you probably care enough to read this through and save your judgment till the end.  And if you happen to no longer want to be my friend at the end, then so be it but know that I don't want to lose you simply because we don't agree.  But let's get one thing straight from the beginning.....just because I disagree with your point of view does not mean, in any way shape or form, that I hate you.  And I would think that nothing I'm about to say would surprise you.  I have never hidden what I believe in and I'm firm in Who I believe in.

Do I believe that homosexuality is a sin?  Yes, I do.  I believe it is a sin just as I believe that lying, adultery, fornication, stealing, blasphemy, being angry are all sins (and the list of sins goes on and on and on).  I know that I sin on a daily basis.  I am a sinner, saved only by the grace of God.  My God, who loved His creation SO much that His Son, who had done nothing wrong, gave His life in the most brutal of ways to make a path so that I, a hopeless sinner, could have a chance to go to Heaven and live with Him someday.  He died for everyone.  He disagreed with the Pharisees, the Jews, and countless other people who tried to put works before faith, who didn't believe Him to be the Son of God, and spit in His face and yet He did not hate them.  In fact, He loved them so much that not only did He die on the cross for them, He asked God to forgive them, for they didn't know what they were doing.  My God does not hate any one....He does however hate the sin that we commit daily.  Our sin keeps us from heaven and we were sinning from the moment we were born.  We were all born selfish sinful creatures and by the grace of God we can be transformed.  If my God can love those who crucified His Son and "disagreed" with Him, how can I do no less?  Will I be successful, not always.  And I won't always do it well.  But that's my goal.  To love others just as Christ loved them.  Do I hate those who practice homosexuality?  No!  I know people who are and I care very much for them!  I care for them as a person.  I love who they are even if I don't agree with what they do.  This culture has made it impossible to distinguish between disagreeing with another's belief system and hating them.  They are not mutually exclusive.  I don't have to agree with you to love you and I don't have to hate you because I disagree with you.  I know some of you on FB live in that way.  Know that if you needed help, I'd come to your side and be there for you.  I won't try to change you as that is not my job.  I do not judge you.  I am a sinner too and I am in no position to judge anyone.  In the end, we will all stand before God and be accountable for our actions.  To say that if we disagree, we hate, then that means I hate most liberal Democrats and that is certainly not the case. :-)

I do believe that marriage was created by God to unite a man and woman in holy matrimony ("What God has put together, let no man put asunder).  God realized that it was not good for man to be alone and He created a helpmate.  Someone who would strengthen him and he would strengthen her.  They would compliment one another.  They would serve God together, united till death.  Those who take marriage between a man and a woman lightly and have affairs and do not commit themselves to this person are also defiling the marriage oath.  Not saying we always get it right.  No one will ever get it right.  I have no issues with gay couples getting civil unions and being able to get benefits from the government, but I think marriage should be off the table.  Simply because marriage is from God, for a man and a woman.  I'm sure you will disagree with me, but try not to hate me because of it.  ;-)

Tolerance does not mean I accept your belief system as true.  It does not mean I'll agree with you and your religion/political preference/sexuality.  It doesn't mean that I think truth is relative and that what's good for you is good for you and what's good for me is good for me.  It means that we'll agree to disagree.  We may never see eye to eye but we can respect each other as a person even if we don't respect the position the other takes.  I find it so interesting that Christians are the least tolerated group there is. I'm not trying to be a martyr but if a Christian tries to pray in school, they are told to take it elsewhere.  Would they also tell a Muslim or Buddhist who also tries to pray to take is elsewhere?  I doubt it.  If a school tries to teach Creation and the Bible, they are forcing religion down the student's throats.  However, you can talk about the Koran and evolution (a theory taken by faith as well) with no outcry.  I try to tell you Merry Christmas and it has to be Happy Holidays but Happy Halloween is just fine (for the record, I have no opinion on Halloween).   I'm cool if you want to believe what you want to believe in.  Just let me do the same.  Be truly tolerant.....just agree to disagree....respectfully.  I hope I still have some friends out there.  I don't want to lose you.  But if what I said offends you and I have disrespected you, please know that was never my intention.  If you get to say what you believe in, then I think I get to do the same.  I hope I have showed that I hate no one and I still care about you.

(This next paragraph is TOTALLY off topic)  Another point that's been bugging me is how we take parts of the constitution and use it to fit our agenda.  First off, if you read it, there is no mention of the separation of church and state.  It's not in there.  What our founding fathers wanted to escape was a state sponsored religion.  They wanted to keep the state out of their religion, telling them when and where to practice.  They didn't necessarily want to keep religion out of government.  The phrase "separation of church and state" came from a letter from Thomas Jefferson.  Another point is the "right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness."  We have certainly expanded on what our rights are and what the government has a "right" to provide for us.  Honestly, the only thing I really want our government to do is to protect me.  Protect our borders and protect our way of life.  Let me live my life the way I want, legally of course.  I won't ask much of you.  I will ask that you keep out of my private business. I'm not asking you to provide insurance, cell phones, etc.  None of those things are "rights".....they are privileges.  And I'm tired of working day in and day out to provide for myself and give myself small luxuries only to pay a lot in taxes to pay for someone else to have luxuries who aren't even willing to work any job.  Let me keep my gun.  With the rise in terrorism and a high distrust in our government (especially as we move towards socialism), let us have a well-armed militia.  I think it's great to have the power to keep our government in check. While we're at it, give power back to the states.  The states know what their citizens need and desire.  So back off, let us do what we know needs to be done.  I am loving what some of the midwest/west states are doing, making their own laws and taking back the power.  Oklahoma, North Dakota, etc....way to go!  Drones?  Seriously?  How about the right to a trial by jury of your peers (provided you aren't a terrorist)?  Stop giving more power to the guy in the White House.  The more we ask of our government to do the "small" things for us (give us phones, give us free internet, give us health insurance), the more power they will have over us.  Let us stop being a dependent society and become independent and strong.  Rant over.  :-)

"How can I do it again?......How can I not?"

 CAMP

One of my cabins in 2004

Nine years ago this upcoming May, I made a decision that would change the rest of my life.  Tonight, I saw a movie that made me remember that what I do changes the world.  Camp serves over 36,000 guests a year, from campers to students to groups that range from princess and guides to church groups to business retreats to a whole host of other specialty groups, all of which are experiences of a lifetime.  We also host a very special group, one that was highlighted in the movie "Camp".  The beauty of camp is that we make a difference in the lives of everyone who comes, not just those who come from troubled pasts.  This movie highlighted kids who have had no one in their life to love them, to care for them, to even give them a birthday party and made them feel, for just one week in their lives, that they were the most important person to someone for that moment in time.  You can't solve all their problems in a week, but you can give them hope and love and those are two of the most powerful forces there are.  You might think that camp only serves the rich kids, the ones without any concerns about where their next meal comes from and that they come from loving spacious homes but in my years here, I've learned a very important thing.  Possessions, money, and never having to want for anything doesn't make a child feel loved and important.  Some kids grow up in huge, full yet empty homes lacking love.  Those kids need camp just as much as those who've wanted for even the most basic needs for their lives.  Some of our kids are grateful to come to camp simply because they got 3 meals a day and a bed.  

I had no idea what I was getting myself into back in 2004.  I had quit graduate school, had no plan for my life, and was lost inside and felt like a failure because I didn't want to do what I thought I was "supposed" to do for my life.  I arrived for my interview scared, nervous, and extremely uncertain.  Scott B did a great job during my interview at least calming me about some of my fears even though I wasn't certain this was the place for me.  Me?  A camp counselor?  No way!  But that little voice inside me said, "Yes way!" and I decided to listen.  I met Amie at the barn and she'll remember the quiet, shy person whom she wondered even if I wanted to be here.  Scott offered me the job the same day and I took the contract home with me and wondered how I'd even tell my parents what I'd be doing and how much I'd be gone.  My mom was great at getting me prepared and I knew my dad was a little sad that I'd be gone.  I arrived at camp for EQ staff training just 6 days after my interview.  Within the first few hours, I knew I was right where I belonged.  After the trainings and the fellowship and relationships I'd built with my fellow counselors, I wondered how life could get any better.....then the kids came.  It got SO much better!  I was a nervous wreck the first day of check-in.  I made mistakes my first week.  I was tired and losing my voice and constantly checking to make sure I still had 10 girls and that they were all okay.  By the end of the week, I was deeply saddened.....because I only had 8 more weeks to do this.  Yeah, there were hiccups along the way.  Days that were hard.  A lost swimmer drill that wasn't a drill and I hadn't been that scared in my life but couldn't show it.  And countless nights of little sleep, hot steamy cabins, and campers that didn't always get along.  And I loved it.  And I loved my girls.  I had a camper my first two weeks.  Angry, hard to love, and almost decked me after rest hour when I tried to wake her up.  But we connected and I tried my best to show her that she was special and that she meant something to me.  We kept up correspondence for a while until the letters stopped.  She was in a juvenile center.  The anger got the best of her.  I'll never forget her though.  Especially the night she asked me if it was okay to not believe in God and we discussed absolute truth and God's love for over 2 hours.  Then there was another camper who, in the group photo on Sunday, stood off to the side, sullen and grumpy.  She was hard to break through but when I put her in charge of the fire for a cookout and she was able to make it, everything changed.  My last picture of her is a smiling, happy joyful woman standing next to her new friend.  There were moments like the time I let the girls shower in the rain or we made a Frisbee zone in the cabin and many more countless moments every day that summer.  I knew, pretty soon into it, that this was a place I never wanted to leave.  I made another decision that July to join the outdoor education crew.  It wasn't a full time position, but it was a seasonal one.  I was not looking for a full time job at that point.  I just knew I didn't want to leave but I still had moments where I wasn't sure if I was "good enough" even though I felt like a good counselor, how would I fit into the full time mode?  I had models like Jason and Heidi who showed me the example of adults being fun and crazy and not caring what anyone else in the world thought of them but also showing love at the same time.  Of course there was Amie every step in the way, believing I could do the job in front of me even when I lacked the confidence.  Then, unexpectedly, on the very last full day of camp that summer.....week 9......Friday......I was asked to be a part of the full time staff.  I was shocked, stunned, and had no answer at that time.  I didn't say yes right away.  Part of me wanted to call home and ask my parents what they thought.  They'd already "lost" their child to this crazy black hole of a camp for a summer.....what would they think of if it was permanent.  Since I had no way of calling, I talked to a few folks (Margo and Siggie!) who said I'd be crazy to not take it.  So I did!  I don't know what all went on behind the scenes for my name to even be brought up as a potential full time employee of one of the best camps in the country/world, but I'm sure that Dave, Heidi, Scott, and Amie probably had a hand in that and that's something I can never forget.  I have never regretted any of those decisions I made that summer.  

But that takes me back to the movie.  It was a great reminder of the power camp has.  In a day in age where budgets are tight, camp still needs to be a priority.  And counselors-you are the life changers and while your college adviser may not think that'll look better than an internship on a resume, I guarantee you that you will gain more life experience from a summer at camp than anything else and you'll change the world that summer.  I don't mean you'll actually change the whole world.  But you'll change somebody's world.  And that means....the world.  I don't normally like to watch movies about camps because they show out of control campers with counselors who just want to have fun but they don't show the side that this movie showed.  That in one week, you can love someone that much.  In the years since I have been a counselor in a cabin, I still hear stories from past campers of, "Remember when....?"  They remember.  I remember.  Even though I don't live in a cabin anymore, I still grow close to the campers I have each week.  I know that some come from privileged homes where they don't feel loved because their parents don't tell them or they are never home.  That's all they want is to feel loved and accepted by an adult.  And I have campers who'll tell me, while we're going out on an early morning trail ride, "I haven't seen my dad since I was 4" or "My mom's been in the hospital for months".  Then there are the kids who show up with a trash bag of clothes, no sleeping bag, no idea what to expect for their week.  These kids break my heart.  And I pray that this one week will stay with them the rest of their lives.  That they'll remember that an adult cared for them, paid attention to them, and that they felt closer to God than they have ever felt and will realize that while that counselor is no longer around, God has never left them.

So when you ask yourself, when you're hot, tired, running low on patience and love, and you still have more to do, "How can I do this again?  How can I keep on going?"  Ask yourself, "How can I not?"  Yeah, camp is hard.  Camp is tiring.  Camp is consuming.  But camp is a life changer and how can I not be a part of that?  I'm proud and encouraged to be a part of it and as summer camp is just around the corner, it's a great boost to moral.

March Madness? Sports Madness!

It's the bottom of the ninth, bases loaded, game winning run to the plate and it's a 3-2 count.........

Cruz's Grand Slam

It's 3rd and long, 5 seconds left, quarterback takes the snap and drops back for the hail mary........

Flutie's Miracle in Miami

Your team is down by 1 and there's 2.5 seconds left on the clock and the inbounds pass is to you.....

Valpo's Heroic Shot

And it happens on the high school level as well.....Logansport Game

How many kids have played out these exact scenarios time and time again in their backyard, at the playground courts, or alone in the gym?  (I know I did!  I played out those 3...2...1 shoot scenario hundreds of times.)  How nervous do we get as spectators watching our favorite team go down to the wire and the win depends on one last play?  (Who remembers Drew Brees heave down the field vs Ohio St the year we went to the Rose Bowl?)  How excited do we get watching a commercial like this one from Dick's Sporting Goods? Untouchable  How high do sports movies rank on your list of "must sees"?  Hoosiers, Rudy, Remember the Titans, Miracle, and the list goes on.  Personally, they rank really high!  I'm a sucker for those underdog sports movies.  I know more than likely what's going to happen but I still love seeing it every time. What about you?

What is it that draws us to sports?  Either the playing or watching?  As athletes, young and old, the preparation we undergo and the pre-game routine we go through and the thrill when the ball is kicked off, first pitch is thrown, or the tip off all excites something deep within us.  I played 2 sports in high school and then continued with intramurals while at Purdue (indoor and outdoor soccer, basketball, etc).  (My little known "what if" was if I'd gone to a smaller school and seen if I could have played there.)  I think if I hadn't gone towards the animal side of things, I would have gone towards sports.  How many have a favorite team and when you talk about them, you say "us" and "we", like we're a part of the team or we belong even though what we do has no impact on the team.

I think part of what draws us in is that the outcome is not predetermined.  Anything can happen and it truly isn't over until the final buzzer sounds.  There is always hope.  Maybe that's what we're wanting.  And it's a lot about the work you put into the preparation.  In a world that expects everything to be handed to them, the sports arena is one of the last places where it isn't (usually!) handed to you but you have to work and prepare and train.  Obviously, potentially, it doesn't guarantee a win but at least you'll know you tried.  I don't know but there's definitely an allure, an attraction, a draw to sports.  To confirm this look no further than the madness beginning this weekend with the bracket pairing for the NCAA tournament.  Why do YOU think there's an allure, a passion within a lot of us while watching, playing sports or watching those stirring commercials?